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Monday, January 16, 2012

Lenny Replies

Lenny wrote:

Dear Rod,

I followed your advice and it didn't work at all. I did everything you said except for two things. I did shave Duke, all except his tail. He wouldn't hold it still even after I put it in a vice. I tried to potty train him, and that didn't work out well either. The two things I didn't do were chop his tail off and take out the garbage. Sarah was really mad that I didn't take out the garbage.

Rod, do you realize how hard it is to get a golden retriever to sit on the toilet? I could get him to sit there with the lid down, but with the lid up..... oh boy! All he wanted to do was get a drink.

So, Rod, I think your advice stinks..... but not as much as our house does. Now all I have is an ugly dog, an even madder wife, stinky garbage, a scratched up toilet seat, and dog hair all over the floor because Sarah wouldn't clean it up. Sarah still wants to leave me.


Dear Lenny,

Why do I have to give advice to such stupid people? This is a blog for crazy advice. That means that smart people don't follow my advice. Smart people don't even ask for my advice. But I should have known that because you asked you would be dumb enough to follow it.

Having said all that, things would probably be okay between you and Sarah if you would only have taken out the garbage and done nothing else. It is still true that women go soft on husbands who take out the garbage. But, no! you couldn't even follow the one sound piece of advice I gave you.

So you have no one to blame but yourself. A little less TV time and more garbage time will fix everything up.

Write me and let me know how things go after you take the garbage out.

Committed to crazy advice,

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