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Friday, March 2, 2012

News Reporter Seeks Rod's Advice

B. Wilhelm wrote:

Dear Rod,
As you know I am the anchorman for a major television network. My job is to report the news and report it in such a way to make the Republicans look bad and the Democrats look good. But sometimes it is just hard to do. When I see Mr. O doing all this apology stuff it just simply turns my stomach, but it is my job to report it and make it sound like the right thing to do. When I heard Mr. O tell Americans about high gas prices and that he wants to solve the problem with alga, I just wanted to scream! But once again it was my job to back him. This kind of stuff goes on and on.

It is also my job to make sure that America hears about all the bad stuff about Mr. Mitts, Mr. Ginko, Mr. Sanitation, and so on. Doing that reporting isn't so hard since I really want to bring these guys down. What I need advice on is how to live with myself for being so partial in my reporting. I mean, that is really weighing heavy.

Dear Mr. Wilhelm,

I am really surprised to hear from you. I don't know if I a much good of helping people deal with their conscience, but I'll give it a try.

First, I think you need to let yourself be brainwashed so that you really believe all the good about the Democrats and all the bad about the Republicans. You need to convince yourself that the Republicans really do want people to be unemployed and homeless without any medical benefits. This will help you to really despise them and speak all manner of evil against them.

Secondly, you need to let yourself be brainwashed into believing that Mr. O's call for high gas prices will really help the poor sap that is barely getting by. Convince yourself that the president really should be able to boss church organizations around and make them buy things that they don't believe in. Once you really believe these things your conscience will be seared and you should have no problem reporting them.

I know just the guy to send you to to be brainwashed..... Rush Limbaugh.

Hope I've helped,

Rod

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