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Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Hank Watches at Home

Hank Wrote:

Dear Rod,

I'm not very good at writing but I will try this anyhow. You sure were right about going to sporting events. Did you see those Rockies last night? Man did they ever stink. I'm sure glad I didn't go to that ball game. I always sits at home and watches them play and when they stinks like that I just shuts them off and grabs another beer and burrito and finds something else to watch. Those millionaire baseball players aren't getting any of my money. Tell Delvin he's right for saving his money.

Dear Hank,

In case you haven't noticed this blog is "Rod's Crazy Advice." I guess that for some of you I will have to Capitalize the word "crazy" and perhaps drop the word "advice." Some of you just don't get it that I use a lot of irony in my blog. And, no, irony is not a metal. But I will be direct with you because you are just plain "stupid." you might have to look that word up in the dictionary if you can find it under all your beer cans and burrito wrappers.

First, of all, you are paying those millionaire baseball players salaries if you watch them on TV. Ever heard of television rights? Your cable company pays for television rights which in turn you pay for with your cable subscription. So let me thumb my nose at you on that one.

Secondly, you were watching the wrong game last night. On another sports channel the Nuggets won their most important game of the season by two points. That would have been worth your money, which by the way you did pay.

Thirdly, I'm not opposed to people squandering their money by going to the ball games and sporting events. It's their money and they can make millionaires out of professional players if they want to. Besides, with ticket prices it is mostly millionaires sitting in the stands anyway. Of course, the Rock Pile still has cheap tickets and the bonus is that you might even get beaned with a home run ball and have a nice lump on your head to show your friends the next day. But if you sit there you'd better bring your binoculars. But careful, you don't want the ball to hit you in the binoculars while looking through them. I can just see your two black eyes now. :-)

Finally, Do you have to get out of your chair to reach the fridge or the pantry? I was just wondering because you seem like the type that just sits. Please don't tell me that you have a bedpan next to your favorite chair.

So my advice to you is to get out of the house. Go to the baseball game. You haven't really lived until someone has spilled a cold beer on you.

And one more thing, you are right..... you aren't very good at writing. You're not supposed to end every other word with an s.

Committed to CRAZY (That is just for you)


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